Life: Oceanside

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Bandana Rama

We have officially reached the teething stage, which means Hudson's hands and every toy he can get his hands on enters his mouth about 23 hours of out of everyday, and the drool....the drool story is REAL folks. I find myself and Hudson covered in it almost everyday. One way of being able to keep him comfortable and dry I have found is bibs (obviously) but all bibs are NOT created equal, by any means. I would put a normal bib on him, or a thinner style and realize that he would be soaked in a matter of minutes, not only was this probably uncomfortable for him, but it also risked him getting lots of moisture under his chin and in his neck area, which can lead to much bigger skin problems...

Luckily, I came across Kaydee Baby Products on Facebook and entered in to a giveaway they were hosting, my friend and I were actually lucky enough to win, and in return we got a free set of their bandana bibs.
Since these bad boys have arrived in the mail we have used them almost daily! (thank goodness there are 4 of them) These bibs are made with not only adorable fabric to match any outift on the front, they are made with a thicker fleece on the backside which absorbs all of the drool/moisture, leaving your baby practically dry, and much more comfortable.

There have been times where I have even just paired the bibs with an outfit regardless if he was having a crazy drool day or not, as they are just WAY to adorable to not wear!

I think my favorite thing about Kaydee Baby (besides the fact that they have incredible products) is they are a husband and wife/mom and dad team who designed this product specifically for their own kids. We all know that we want the best for our kids and I find so much comfort knowing not only am I purchasing a great product from someone who truly has a passion for what they do, but also that I am helping another family such as my own follow their dream.

So if you are looking for a little gift for your baby or for a fellow Mama friend this holiday season try to look for these awesome small shops who truly do what they do because they LOVE to do it. #shopsmall and head over to my Instagram as Kaydee Baby is giving away not only a set of their adorable bandana bibs, but also a set of their new organic teething pads as well!

Monday, November 9, 2015

Nov-cember: A Life:Oceanside Christmas

I cannot believe it is already November, where in the heck has this year gone.

This year is Hudson's "1st year" as in every holiday is extra special because this is the year that we get to make all of our family traditions and decide what it is that we want to do with him for the rest of his life.

There were huge traditions I had every holiday with my family like my mom making the Easter Bunny footprints out of baby powder, how green been casserole was served at EVERY Thanksgiving, and my least favorite as a child how presents could only be opened on Christmas AFTER everyone had eating and ALL of the dishes were hand washed, dried, and put back in their place in the kitchen. (I still think this was done JUST to torture us ;)

This year I am slightly bummed as our family is slightly all over the place for Thanksgiving which means we won't be celebrating our usual 20 person feast. Porter, Hudson, and I will most likely be ordering pizza and watching Christmas movies...
yes, I said Christmas.

Since we don't get to celebrate Thanksgiving I have decided that we are going to do two months of Christmas I know there are those people who are totally anti-Christmas anything until after Thanksgiving, and usually I am with you. However, this is Hudson's FIRST Christmas, and this is our first Christmas being parents.
I want to build awesome traditions and make this the BEST Christmas the 3 of us have ever had.
I am going to be sharing those traditions, some of our DIY ideas, creations, etc. all over this blog the next few weeks (7 weeks to be exact) and I would LOVE for you all to join along.
I am also going to be sharing some of my favorite baby-friendly shops for those of you who, who may be looking to Shop Small this holiday season.
I am dubbing the whole shebang as Nov-cember.

I am so excited to celebrate Hudson's first Christmas, and to be able to share our journey to the special day with all of you!

What are your favorite holiday traditions???

Side note: if you are anti-Christmas/holiday until after Thanksgiving, be sure to check back on November 27th and catch up on everything you missed!

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

The Time I Failed At Breastfeeding

I hate doing it in public....
doing what you ask? Preparing a bottle with formula.
Why? Because I feel like every person within a mile of me is questioning why I am feeding my child formula and not breastfeeding because we all know and have heard a 1000x in our mom lives that "breast is best"....

The sad part about my statement above, is there is probably no one looking at me when I prepare a bottle in public. I think it is my own  guilt. My guilt that I personally was unable to do what I needed and so desperately wanted to do as a mother.
Feed my baby from my own body.

When Hudson was born, It was via c-section. I requested skin to skin right away, and they granted my wish. He was on me within a few seconds of being born and he was able to be on my chest the entire time they stitched me up. I was so thankful for the nurses and my doctor for allowing this as I truly believe it made the beginning of our journey so successful.  Hudson latched immediately and fed like a champ. We left the hospital with no issues and by his first 2 week appointment he was already above and beyond his birth weight. We were making excellent progress and he was an amazing eater.

I was told from fellow Mama friends not to pump before 4 weeks as my supply needed to level it's self out. I was literally over producing like crazy. I would leak through a breast pad in an hour easily and would literally be covered in breast milk if I wasn't covered for a millisecond (TMI) but in other words I was a milk machine...
I pumped very little after the 4 weeks, I was nervous and didn't really understand the concept, plus I wasn't planning on returning to work so building a supply was not a priority to me, and I just left well enough alone and let Hudson call the shots by feeding only on me, on demand.

When Hudson was 2 months old we took a 2 week trip to Minnesota to visit family. This trip was very stressful for me because he was little, we were far from home and our routine, we both got really sick from the airplane, and it was just a big adventure to take being SUCH a new mom.
I had a feeling that something was not right with my body, but I thought it was just due to the stress and the sickness. Hudson wasn't acting any different, and I am known to overreact in certain situations, I just kept telling myself that I was fine, I was just overcoming the virus I was fighting and everything was great.
Upon returning home from our trip I just had a gut feeling that something was not right. He was getting frustrating while feeding, he wasn't staying latched long at all, and he seemed to never be satisfied.  Our appointment with the pediatrician was not for a few weeks and I was so nervous that something wasn't right with my body. That next day I went to a breastfeeding support group, where I knew they would have an infant scale. I remember the moment when I laid him on it and was horrified at the numbers staring back at me.
He weighed the same amount that he weighed 4 weeks prior. So either he was only maintaining weight, or had not been receiving what he needed by any means and was loosing.
I cried and cried and cried that entire meeting in front of 20 women I had never met. There were moms there that told me I was not alone and they were having the same issues, but even hearing that you are not alone, you feel totally and utterly alone.
I felt like I failed my child and I hated myself and my body for not producing what it needed to keep my baby safe and full.

I called my pediatrician immediately after the meeting and made an appointment that day to see them, it was only confirmed there that it was true, he was the same weight as our previous appointment almost a month earlier. My pediatrician requested I pump, and see how much I could produce, and we would go from there.
When I got home I realized I had only pumped 2 ounces...I was mortified. She suggested I supplement by using my frozen stash of what I had of my breast milk, and that I supplement after that with formula after every feeding. The word "formula" made me so nervous. It was not in my plan, and I wasn't quite prepared at that moment to just add it to our daily routine. I thankfully have a dear dear friend who offered me donor milk and with the approval of my pediatrician we started supplementing with her milk after he fed off me.
I did EVERYTHING to get my supply up. 6 pills of Fenugreek, and 3 pills of Blessed Thistle a day...on top of drinking 3 cups of Mother's Milk lactation tea. I ate oats, I drank 30 gallons of water, I did EVERYTHING.
but every time I pumped to see how much I could produce. It dropped, and dropped, and dropped.
It seemed the harder I worked to boost it, the faster it went away.
I stood no chance against my own body, and our personal breastfeeding journey was over.

My girlfriend continued to supply us with donor milk until Hudson was 3 months old.I am so thankful for her each and everyday for giving me that extra month of breast milk protection for him, and to keep him healthy and satisfied with her breast milk, when I, his own mother, couldn't provide that for him.

I remember that appointment that followed with my pediatrician at his 3 month well check. She asked if I would be open to formula, and I answered with tears in my eyes..."yes."
Why was I crying? It is not like I was making a devastating decision. Formula is NOT bad, it keeps babies alive everyday.
However, I felt like I had failed once again. The weight of the failure sat on my chest and it just kept getting heavier and heavier as time went on, and the  more I dried up.
I felt like a horrible mother, and I hated my body for letting not only me, but my precious baby down.

I am thankful for an amazing pediatrician who told me she was proud of me for the 3 months I made it, and that he had a great start. I am thankful for the amazing friends who shared with me that I was not alone, that this had happened to them as well, I am thankful for the amazing sisterhood of the mothers who stand by one another when we need to be reminded that we are "doing okay." Even when we feel like we deserve the award for "Worst Mom Ever."

I am still bitter at myself for not being able to fulfill the want to feed my baby, but I am also thankful for formula. I am thankful that it was able to step in immediately and pick up where my body left off. I am thankful for formula as it continues to help him grow. I am thankful for Formula because it keeps my baby happy and healthy every day.

Breast milk or formula, who cares.
I cared too much for a long time. I spent a lot of time being hard on myself for something I could by no means control, and that is what motherhood does to you.
So whatever choices you make for your family everyday, just make sure it is right for YOU. Not what is right to everyone else.
No one wins that battle.

Remember, we are all in this together.
and to all my mom friends.
You are doing an AMAZING job.
Failure doesn't have to be just the end of something good; it can be a beginning of something better.

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